BRIGHTON PIZZA GIRL.

Gossip & Grumbles

Rubbish Special

With

Pizza Girl.



To bin or not to bin that is the question?

This Pizza girl was among the thousands of disappointed residents whose
homes were not chosen to have a container and a bay outside. It appears
the Council, swamped with requests,decided to site them adjacent to
the least wealthy looking homes. No councillors were allowed to have a
bin outside their home either, so I suppose that's fair.


Brighton Tourist officers predict West Hill tourism is set to grow in
2004 as the new containers will encourage eco tourism. Envious Brighton
and Hove residents from areas not blessed with the bin bays scheme will
be attracted to our streets to make their own contributions. A woman
from Saltdean was among eighty three people who complained to the
Council, ìWhy should we always miss out to places like the Dials? she
said. They can't stop us coming and using the bins, I would come in
under the cover of darkness if necessary and so would my brother-inlaw."
Strong feelings indeed.



Where do the Council get their inspiration from? Edinburgh? Apparently
not.
A friend of mine who has an aunt who works as a cleaner at the town hall
accidentally overheard that Council bosses returning from a fact
finding visit to Hong Kong were so impressed with the Chinese night
markets they decided to introduce them here. Hence the creation of the
new twenty four hour mini market bays.It ís hoped they will become a
community resource for the recycling, swapping, buying and selling of
household and building waste. Tourism chiefs are so excited they are
hoping their new rubbish scheme will one day rival ebay.My friendís
aunt also accidentally overheard that the money saved by sacking dustmen
has been earmarked to fund face painting school children to parade at
the night markets with paper lanterns on sticks.

New Bins could become eco - logical by generating much needed funds by
selling advertising space. It is thought Macdonalds might be interested
in branding the containers to promote their healthy option organic milk,
as well as that warm cow patty stuff in between that soggy round
bread-like thing that was once so popular world-wide. If that does
happen, once again the big boys will take the glamour, while local
shops like Systems Electronics will miss out. Still it would look nice
though.

A leading and very handsome local estate agent predicted new bin bays
outside of properties could increase values by quite a bit.



Bad news for Montpelier Crescent residents.
The Xmas tree recycling enclosure was to be retained all year round
offering a different use each month. After minutes of public
consultation this innovative idea has now been shelved. Originally
planned to pilot in February as a soiled mattress collection centre
{S.M.C.C.] public enthusiasm waned before the scheme ever got off the
ground. Bizarrely the project was actually cancelled at its own launch
event. A first year urban studies student living in Terminus Road
explained,
"Why would we want to lug a heavy stained mattress around
there when we can make it available to someone else at one of the new
night market bays that have been springing up?î The boy has got a point.
Adrian and I would like to thank the Council for the drinks and canapés
at the launch event .


In the interest of objectivity, balance and the chance to get out the
house and visit the new "I was open on Christmas Day" Couch Bar, I
conducted this scientific objective Pizza Girl Poll.

The top three plus points for the bins - Our survey said :-

1. More wild life
2. Less parking
3. Good exercise for the old and infirm.

The top three points against the bins - Our Survey said :-

1. More wild life
2. Less Parking
3. Assumes some local residents are irresponsible, selfish, and
incapable of bagging rubbish sensibly and putting waste out just before
the waste management operatives call. The Council should stop
interfering. We can keep our own streets clean.

Mixed views indeed, the Council want to test bed us for a year, cheeky
things! Lets talk about it in two monthsí time.

Write me.
Pizza Girl.

Pizza Girl is not sponsored by
System Electronics
Who have been serving the community with repairs nearly forever.

.